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4000 E. Collins
Rd. “Preaching the Living
Word through the Written Word (2Tim 4:2)” |
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DEALING WITH CORINTHIAN QUESTIONS: (Celibacy, Marriage, and Divorce) 1Co 7:1-16 (8/31/11) Grace Bible Church,
Gillette, Wyoming Pastor Daryl
Hilbert I.
INTRODUCTION A. In chapters
1-6, Paul dealt with Corinthian misbehavior, whether in regard to their
internal divisions (1:10-4:21) or their mishandling of sin within the church
(5:1-13; 6:12-20) or without (6:1-11). B. Beginning in
chapter 7, Paul begins to deal with questions which the Corinthians had (“Now concerning the things about which you wrote”). It
appears that they had questions on celibacy, marriage, and divorce. These
topics would have been especially relevant in the Corinthian society where
sexual immorality was wide-spread. C. Therefore,
Paul is not giving a complete doctrinal treatise on these subjects; rather he
is giving enough pertinent information to answer them. II. NO MARITAL
CELIBACY (1-6) A. The Bible
student is faced with looking at Paul’s answers and determining what exactly
the questions were. In each case, the questions were precipitated with the
challenge of living purely in an impure culture. For instance Paul will deal
with the question of marital celibacy. In other words, since impurity was a
problem of man’s sin nature, wouldn’t it be better to abstain from all sexual
activity, including in a marriage relationship? B. [1Co 7:1] -
Paul begins with, “it is good for a man not to
touch a woman.” This expression refers to sexual relations. The word for
“touch” (ha,ptō
- lit. “lay hold of”, fig. sexual relations - Friberg) is
translated by the NET as “sexual relations” and NIV as “marry.” Paul is
speaking with general reference to the gift of celibacy, where those with
that gift are better off than those without the gift. This is not a general
admonition for all Christians to be celibate. However, pre-marital sexual
relations or anything outside the marriage bonds is sin. C. [1Co 7:2] -
However, since not everyone has the gift of celibacy, and since it was God
who instituted marriage (Gen 2:24 cp. Mat 19:5), it would not work out for
the individual who does not have the gift of celibacy to live as though they
do. Especially in light of “immoralities” (porneia - any and all sexual immorality) in the
culture at Corinth. If someone does not have the gift of celibacy (and
apparently only a few do), each man is to have his own
wife, and each woman is to have her own husband. Note that marriage is intended
to be monogamous (“own wife”, “own
husband”). D. [1Co 7:3] - However, some
evidently were already married and wondering if they should live in marital
celibacy. Paul answers that each spouse has a duty to meet the physical needs
of their spouse. “Fulfill” is a present imperative of apodidōmi (give back,
pay back, return, fulfill) and means, “you must keep on fulfilling.” E. [1Co 7:4] - Paul argues that
neither spouse has authority (exousia,zō - power, mastery, or
right) over
their own body but rather the spouse has the rights and authority over it.
Christ’s self-less love applies in all areas of marriage. F. [1Co 7:5] -
The construction of this present imperative could indicate that some
Christians had been guilty of marital celibacy and Paul’s command was to
“stop depriving each other!” (apostere,ō - to rob or deny). There was perhaps one exception to
temporary celibacy and that would be in desperate times when a couple would
commit themselves to prayer. This would have to be “by mutual agreement” and
only for a time. The temporary celibacy was to end so that Satan would not
take the abstinence as an opportunity for temptation. The “lack of
self-control” here does not refer to spiritual weakness but to those void of
the gift of celibacy. G. [1Co 7:6] -
Paul is not commanding a couple to deprive themselves for the sake of prayer,
but rather giving them a concession to do so. The concession does not apply
to marriage, which is a divinely directed institution. III. THE GIFT OF
CELIBACY (7-9) A. [1Co 7:7] -
Paul gives his opinion about celibacy from his own perspective. Was Paul a
celibate? This verse seems to indicate it. He views celibacy (and marriage)
as a gift from God. His desire was that all were celibate as he himself was.
Surely, widowhood would not be considered a gift from God. The argument for
Paul’s possible married state comes from Acts 26:10 where it appears that he
cast a vote with the Sanhedrin. According to tradition, in order to be part
of the Sanhedrin, one had to be married. Perhaps Paul was giving an
unofficial vote with the Sanhedrin because in 1Co 9:5, when referring to the
apostles’ right to be married, he uses Peter as an example of a married man
and not himself. 1Co 7:7 makes the most sense when Paul is identified with
the gift of celibacy. Note that marriage also is a gift and not spiritually
inferior to the gift of celibacy. B. [1Co 7:8] -
In regard to widowhood, it was Paul’s advice to remain unmarried. Those
unmarried should at least give God the opportunity to reveal whether they
have the gift of celibacy or not. C. [1Co 7:9] -
But if they do not have the gift of celibacy it is better for them to marry
rather than burn with desire. Some explain self-control not only in control
of sexual activity but also sexual desire. In other words, a celibate has no
desire to be married in any aspect of marriage. It also appears that the term
“unmarried” (1Co 7:8, 11, 32, 34) refers to those who are single or divorced
but not necessarily celibate. IV. DIVORCE IS
NOT AN OPTION BETWEEN TWO BELIEVERS (10-11) A. [1Co 7:10] -
Paul gives more advice no doubt to other questions asked by the Corinthians.
This advice is to a couple made up of two believers. Paul says that the
instruction is from the Lord, meaning that somewhere along the line the words
of the Lord were compiled and Paul was quoting from them. The advice is this:
a believing spouse cannot “leave” (chorizo
- leave, depart, i.e. divorce, vs.10; aphiemi - send away, leave, divorce, vs. 11) the other
believing spouse. B. [1Co 7:11] -
If by chance there is a divorce between two believers their only two options
are, remain unmarried or else be reconciled. Of course reconciliation is to
be sought at all costs. C. There is an
exception in the words of Jesus and divorce and remarriage is only allowed if
there was infidelity in the marriage (Mat 5:32; 19:9). But even then there is
still a possibility for reconciliation. V. DIVORCE IS
PERMITTED NOT REEQUIRED BETWEEN UNEQUALLY YOKED (12-16) A. [1Co 7:12] - Paul
now refers to a marriage where only one of the spouses is a believer. Paul
now says that is not the Lord speaking here, but himself. Paul is not saying
that he is not sure if he has the authority to say this or that perhaps he in
incorrect in his view. Paul’s writings were inspired and on this point there
were no quotations from the Lord. Nevertheless, Paul’s apostleship made his
teaching right and authoritative. The situation was a believer and an
unbeliever married. Probably it refers to two unbelievers being married and
one of them comes to Christ. B. [1Co 7:13] -
If the unbelieving spouse does not want to leave and consents to live with
them, then the believer is to stay married to them and not divorce. C. [1Co 7:14] -
Paul reasons that the unbelieving spouse is sanctified through the believing
spouse. “Sanctified” (hagiia,zō
- set apart or make holy) here does not mean that the unbelieving spouse and
children are saved through the believing souse. Instead it refers to the
protection and blessing upon the believer and their household. MacArthur
holds that the children are “holy” in that they won’t be defiled if the
believing spouse remains with the unbeliever. D. [1Co 7:15] -
However, if the unbeliever leaves (probably because their spouse’s faith),
the believer is to let them leave. In such cases, the believer is free to
remarry. E. [1Co 7:16] -
In fact, Paul argues that there is always a chance that if a believer stays
with the unbeliever, they may come to Christ after being exposed to the
gospel. Paul uses a term in interesting human terms. He states how does the
spouse know whether or not “they will save” the unbelieving spouse. Certainly
Paul knows that it is the Lord who does the saving. But he uses this very
practical term to show that the believer will have a part to play, as do all
believers. VI. OBSERVATIONS
AND APPLICATIONS A. Even though
there is advice for the unequally yoke marriage, God never sanctions a
believer marrying an unbeliever (2Co 6:14-18). One cannot use 1Co 7:12-16 to
justify an unequally yoked marriage. In fact the reverse may be equally true
to those who insist they can save their spouse after they are married, “How
do you know whether you will save your spouse or not?” B. Missionary
dating is not only unreliable but very dangerous. It can lay the foundation
for a lifelong marriage of dispute, disagreement, disappointment, and
dejection. The only guarantee for a successful marriage is to not only marry
a believer, but marry one that is dedicated to the Lord. C. Divorce is
not an option for believers. Divorce is never God’s plan or will.
Incompatibility is not a Scriptural reason for divorce. However, we do serve
a God of forgiveness and grace so that even the divorced can have a vibrant
testimony and ministry within the church. |
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