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- Preaching the Living WORD through
the Written WORD - 2 Tim 4;:2 - |
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“AS FOR ME AND MY
HOUSE, WE WILL SERVE THE LORD” (2014 GBC THEME) “CHRISTIAN HOME -
4” (Pr 22:6; 1Ti 3:4) 2/16/14 Grace Bible Church,
Gillette, Wyoming Pastor Daryl Hilbert I. TRAINING OF CHILDREN A. Manage your children (1Ti 3:4) 1. The context is in reference to an elder’s
qualifications. But in regard to raising children,
this would also be the guideline for all believers. 2. The parent must “manage” his children.
The word for “manage” is proistāmi literally
means to “put before.” It conveys the idea to put oneself (responsibly) at
the head, in the lead, and in charge of the family’s spiritual well-being. It
also has the meaning of “care for.” “Manage” is a good translation for the
“caring leadership” of the parents. 3. The idea is that the parents manage the
children rather than the children managing the parents. This is expressed in the words, “keeping his children under control.” The word for “under control” is hupotagā (from hupotassō) and means “in subjection.” In a cross
reference, Titus 1:6 states that children are not to be
even accused of “dissipation or rebellion.” In other words, parents
are to lead their children to Christ (“who believe”) and keep them from
reckless immoral behavior (asōtia) and
a rebellious attitude (anupotaktos). 4. The phrase “with all dignity” (1Ti 3:4)
could refer either to the children or the elder
(parent). If it applies to the children, then they must be
taught to behave in a respectable and dignified manner. If it applies
to the elder (or parent), then the parent must exercise raising their
children in a respectable and dignified manner. B. Train your Children (Pr 22:6) 1. A very famous proverb concerning child-training is Pr 22:6. The idea of “train” (chanak) means to “dedicate” as in dedicating an
offering to God (1Ki 8:63; 2Ch 7:5). This certainly would be understood that
God-fearing parents will dedicate their children to the Lord much the same
way Samuel was dedicated (1Sa 1:11). But the word is
best understood with its basic meaning to “begin,” “initiate,” or
“inaugurate.” In other words, God-fearing parents are to initiate godly child-training in the beginning of their childrens’ lives. The emphasis is on the parents’
commitment and dedication to raise their children in the instruction of the
Lord. 2. They are to bring up their children so
that their way or manner of life is pleasing to the Lord. 3. This proverb carries with it a truism of
God’s wisdom that, when the child is old, he will not depart from his early
childhood teaching. It is something that parents can look forward to as a
general truth from God’s Word. But the
responsibility lies upon the tireless efforts of the parents in managing
their children. II. TRAINING WITH BIBLICAL GUIDELINES A. Pr 29:4 is in the
context of a king or one who is in authority. Parents are the authority
figures of their children. So in a secondary sense, Pr 29:4 it can be applied to parents. B. Pr 29:4 states, “The king gives stability to the land by justice.”
The people of the land have stability because they know that the king will
rule by what is just and right. They do not have to fear if they obey justice
and the just rules of the king. C. In the same way, children have stability
in a family when they are governed by biblical
rules. When biblical rules are put into place, the
children know what is expected of them. They know that others will not get
away breaking the rules. And they know what will
happen if they themselves break the rules. So there
is great benefit by establishing rules (biblical rules) in the home. D. Practical Steps: 1. Write
down the wise and godly character qualities that God desires your child to
live by (wisdom, pure heart, truthfulness, diligence, generosity, submissive
spirit, kindness, humility etc.). Do not be afraid to reward these
characteristics, especially when they have been corrected
and have been working on them. 2. Write down behavior that God desires to be corrected in your child’s life (disobedience, lying,
rebellion, stinginess, stealing, laziness, pride etc.). Write down the
specific corrections and punishment for unbiblical behavior. Go over the
rules, rewards, corrections, and punishments for breaking the rules with the
child. Make sure the child understands them. Make sure you as parents are
fully prepared to carry them out. Make sure you are consistent and that they
apply to the household. 3. The Book of Proverbs is an excellent
place to discern the types of character qualities to implement and to be avoided. E. Additional Thoughts: 1. If all
we have is corrective rules and do not teach wise and godly character then
children will not learn how to “act,” but only “react.” 2. Children desire to please their parents
and need encouragement from them (Pr 17:6). 3. Parents that yell all the time never
convey to the children what it is that they really want from the children. Also, parents that are pleased with unspiritual things
send confusing signals to their children. 4. Be excited about spiritual growth in your
children. It is difficult enough for a child to attempt to go out and live
for the Lord against an evil world, only to come a home where no one is
excited about his or her attempt to live for the Lord. 5. In order to influence children in wise
and godly character, parents must first be consistently living godly
character and teaching godly character. F. Example of Character to
Be Rewarded: Wisdom 1. Wisdom (chokmah - skill, Ex 28:3; 31:3,6; Is 10:13; Is 11:2) could be defined as the skill
to live before a holy God. 2. Wisdom is the theme of the book of
Proverbs (Pr 1:7; 9:10) and according to Proverbs, wisdom is the preeminent
character to learn (Pr 4:5, 7; 16:16). 3. Wisdom is gained by (Pr 2:1-6): a) Meditating
on God’s principles in Scripture (2:1, 5-6). b) Finding and applying God’s principles in
Scripture (2:2). c) Asking God for wisdom from His principles
in Scripture (2:3; Ja 1:5). d) Seeking and studying God’s principles in
Scripture (4). 4. The
influence of a parent on a child is tremendous as illustrated by David’s
influence on Solomon to get wisdom (1Ch 1:7-11 cp. Pr 4:3-7). 5. Wisdom ought to be the premiere character quality that a
parent instills in their child (Pr 14:35). G. Example of Character to Be
Corrected: Lying 1. Since
a Christian home is based upon the promises of a truthful and faithful God,
lying is not becoming in a Christian home (Pr 17:7). Lying must
be dealt with. 2. Lying here is the Heb word rq,v, sheqer which carries the significance of breaking a
promise or a covenant. 3. God is a truthful and faithful God who
cannot lie or break a covenant, a promise, or his word (Ps 89:33-34; Num
23:19). 4. If we desire to know what displeases the
Lord in our lives and homes, lying is on the top of
the list (Pr 6:16-18; Pr 12:22). 5. Lying is so devastating because it can
either lead to or reveal deeper sins of the heart (Pr 10:18; 26:28). 6. We inevitably will spare our children
greater discipline from the Lord (Pr 12:19; Pr 19:9). 7. A Christian home is to be
based on the truth of the Word of God (1Th 2:13). Therefore
truthfulness in the home must be preserved at all costs. a) When regard for truth has been broken down
or even slightly weakened,
all things will remain doubtful. Augustine. III. OBSERVATIONS AND APPLICATIONS A. Parenting is a lot of hard work. That is
why when young people want to get married, parents and others will tell them,
getting married and having a family is a lot of hard word. It is a serious
and life-changing obligation. B. Fathers - not just bring about obedience,
bring about productive Christians who are obedient |
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